Star Wars Christmas Special
Look, I don’t smoke pot. I’m allergic to it or something, it’s not a principle or anything. But sometimes I wish I did, because sometimes I find an activity that’s so perfect for the state of being high that I am deeply jealous of the people who can achieve it.
That happened yesterday, when my teenagers introduced me to the Star Wars Christmas Special, which is a truly extraordinary feature length movie, and is really a perfect stoner flick.
I’m really not giving anything away by telling you that there’s a lot of scenes involving Chewbacca’s family, hoping he makes it home in time for “Life Day.” Each of those scenes is inexplicably long and devoid of subtitles.
In fact, it’s really not a stretch to say that every scene in the entire movie is inexplicably long. But that’s perfect for high folks, who are known to drive at 15 miles an hour on the highway and worry they’re speeding.
For those of you who are not high: I suggest you skip this one. I watched it because I’m a huge Star Wars nerd, but even I couldn’t remember why while I was doing it, except that I like hanging out with teenagers rolling on the rug in laughter because it’s so bad it’s good.
According to my kids, George Lucas himself said about this film that if he “had enough time, he’d track down every copy of this film and destroy it.” You have been warned.